"Everybody’s changing and I don’t feel the same anymore.
Perhaps.....
I'm changing too.

If being good is to be a fool, then perhaps, a fool I was meant to be."

P.s: "The world needs a bit more honesty; to others, to one another. But most importantly, to one's self."

I hate feeling silly & stupid & deflated.

I hate people looking at my poor presentation.

That's why I was always so nervous.

I hate feeling so inferior.

P.s: I need to do something about it.

Sometimes I do really feel that life is so unfair.



P.s: Sigh.

Everything just go down ever since I bang the car. My savings are almost gone. Speculating the equity market is no child's play. I really hope that these are grindings that make me a better stock player. I have reflected and was really upset over the huge blow to me. I am really not focused in things I do. However, I believe that everything happens for a reason and I have become more prudent. I've learned to believe that hard work and study will get me where I want to go to, and I will have to adhere to that with sheer determination.

"But after you get to a certain stage, it is necessary to discover the new you. You know, do not repeat too much of the same work, and you can have a breakthrough."



P.s: I want to succeed in things I do and not be a hopeless failure.

I felt a chill deep down my heart tonight. =/



P.s: Inexplicable.

Maybe this kind of thing, it's all wrong from the beginning. To people, I guess the feeling is like a descending graph.


P.s: Natural.

When can I stop using the word tired? Yes, I'm exhausted both physically and mentally. I think I need a break from the daily chores and have a good 48hours sleep. Sometimes I was wondering, why am I working so hard in my NS life, doing things behind the scene that people don't usually see or appreciate. I can just go to the doctor and ask for a few days mc just like many others. Seriously speaking, I am not motivated to do any of the stuff in the office anymore. I am just fulfilling my responsibilities and that's about it. I am tired already.

However, I am happy to see some of my best buddies blissfully with their loved ones. How much I envy them. =)) May god bless you people!

I am tired of all these kind of stuff already. These kind of stuff kind of pales a bit when you get older and disappointed when you see through what most girls are. I am a student afterall, can I please fucking focus for once and start opening up my notes this weekend? Exams around the corner and I am still totally clueless. I am too easily distracted and manipulated sometimes and it is something I should seriously look into. I seriously play around too much. Where is my time management? And I still dare to tell people I manage my time well. What loads of bullshit.



P.s: I better reflect on myself.

Even though I feel so god damn tired after army and attending half of the tutorial today, leaving off earlier for an early night. I am actually reminiscing those fond memories right now. Oh my!




P.s: It was an outrageously sudden decision to go for ken's birthday celebration but it was indeed an unforgettable and enjoyable Saturday night. Thanks people who makes it happening, I hope everyone does enjoy the night as much as I do.